Pornography

Is Porn Good or Bad?

Do you view, listen to, or read pornography? How often? What do you like about it? And how do you feel about watching porn? Do you consider it morally reprehensible or destructive to people? Do you consider it life-enhancing?

Just like anything else, porn has a lot of benefits for our sexual, emotional, and mental health. It can also have negative consequences that people need to be wary of.

It is important to note that despite its negative consequences, what really matters is your relationship with porn. It needs to be a healthy relationship. 

In this article, I will tell you a lot about pornography, including why you should watch it, the reasons why it is good for you, and the reasons why it can be bad for you. There are also some myths about pornography that I am going to debunk. So, keep reading!

What is Porn? 

What is Porn?

Pornography refers to anything—whether video, image, audio, book, text, etc.—that is sexually explicit or depicts people having sex to provide erotic entertainment or arousal to people.

Is it Normal to Watch Porn?

Of course, it is normal to watch porn. Although several people refuse to admit that they watch porn because of the fear of being judged and other reasons, it’s been estimated that 5.81 billion people in the world visit the top 3 porn sites monthly (Pornhub, XVideos, and XNXX). Is that surprising? It means there are about 134,491 new website visits per minute on the 3 porn sites, and every minute, there are about 2.4 million people viewing porn. These numbers are just for the 3 top porn sites, so imagine what the combined numbers for all porn sites in the world are.

Benefits of Watching, Listening to, or Reading Porn

When used in moderation, porn has several benefits. If you use porn often, it is important for you to know when to stop and when to take breaks to keep your self-control in check. 

Here are the benefits:

  • It feels good and is a great source of sexual pleasure.
  • It gives you a way to communicate your sexual needs, wants, and desires. For example, you can watch a video together that depicts things that you desire, want, or need from your partner(s) so that they can learn them and reenact them during your sexual encounters.
  • It helps you find new things to explore.
  • You can use pornography to explore your sexual fantasies and fulfill your sexual desires.
  • It is a form of foreplay and can be a great way to initiate sex. You can watch porn together to get aroused and start a sexual session. You can also read erotica or listen to audio porn for arousal before initiating sex.
  • It can be a way to spice things up. You can watch videos together and reenact the scenes so that your sex life won’t be too monotonous.
  • It is a source of information to improve sexual skills. You can learn how to do several sexual acts through porn, like oral sex. You can also learn about new sex positions. 
  • It increases sexual desire.
  • It makes it easier to have pleasurable solo sex because of increased arousal.
  • It is a fantastic way to de-stress.
  • It destigmatizes sex to make various sexual activities and kinks feel less intimidating. It also enhances comfort with sex and makes people more open-minded. 
  • It can negatively impact relationships. An unhealthy relationship with sex can negatively impact relationships when one partner is unable to have sex or spend quality time with their partner(s) because they are always viewing porn. Additionally, if one partner is anti-porn while the other partner(s) loves porn, they might experience issues. It can result in one partner hiding or lying about watching porn, which can cause mistrust and ruin the relationship.
  • Addiction. Addiction and its related issues can result from compulsive porn use.
  • Unrealistic sexual expectations.
  • Body image issues. Lots of pornographic materials promote an unrealistic view of what the body and genitals should look like. If you find yourself watching videos with slim actors or actors with voluptuous bodies, you might think any other body type is unattractive. It can lower your self-esteem and make you feel like you’re not beautiful enough. Mainstream pornography can make you think your vulva is unattractive if it looks different from the ones you see in the videos. It can also make you feel insecure about your penile size because most male actors have large or enormous penises.
  • Dissatisfaction with sexual and romantic relationships. Porn can give users a “twisted” view of sex and intimacy and cause them to experience less satisfaction in their sexual encounters because they expect so much more. 
  • Increased misogyny and sexist attitudes. Some pornography encourages the objectification of women in real life. It can also result in negative attitudes toward women, including stereotypes and hostility. 
  • Sexually aggressive pornography or pornography that depicts sexual violence or rape acts can encourage and normalize sexual violence. 
  • Encouragement of risky sexual behaviors. Condom usage and the use of other forms of barrier protection in porn are rare and can result in users being more interested in unprotected oral and penetrative sex.

Important Things to Note About Porn 

  1. Most pornography isn’t reality. Pornstars act in porn. It is usually not a realistic depiction of how sex happens in real life. The scenes are scripted and planned out in advance to provide erotic entertainment. 
  2. Actors don’t ask for consent in the videos because they sign contracts that make it clear that they are agreeing to do the scene before they start shooting. This is unlike real-life sex, which requires mandatory, informed, and enthusiastic consent.
  3. Things are exaggerated in porn. Porn actors feel the need or are required to show that they are enjoying the session, whether they are feeling no pleasure or whether they are experiencing pain or discomfort. Their aim is to make sex look fun and appealing. As a result, you might see women having orgasms all the time just from penetrative sex. You might also see men taking so long to cum because they are required to cum at the time they are told to. The sex positions depicted in porn are also more about the camera placement and the ability to see the bodies and genitals than how enjoyable they are. 

How Often Should You Watch Porn?

There is no right answer to this question because it all depends on the relationship you have with pornography, whether it is causing you distress, whether it is getting in the way of your daily life, and whether you find yourself watching porn when you have to do other things like work, study, spend time with your partner(s) or friends, etc. It is also about your self-control.

Like I mentioned before, you need to take healthy breaks if you find yourself watching porn every single time you have some spare time, or if you find yourself doing it all the time. Healthy breaks ensure that you maintain your self-control to prevent addiction.

Signs that Porn is Bad For You

  1. You spend far too much time watching porn than you wish you would.
  2. Porn is negatively impacting your relationships.
  3. You’ve lost control over porn use (compulsion).
  4. Watching pornography comes with feelings of guilt or shame.
  5. You have unrealistic expectations about sex because of porn.
  6. You are staying up late and losing out on sleep because of porn.
  7. You aren’t completing work or you are ignoring your work duties because of porn.
  8. You find yourself missing out on social obligations because of porn.

Common Myths About Porn

  1. Watching porn causes erectile dysfunction; there is no evidence to support this claim. 
  2. Pornography causes depression. Contrary to this belief, a 2007 study found that the majority of people who regularly watch porn believe that it enhances their lives. If you experience negative emotions when viewing or listening to pornography, it is more likely due to your relationship with pornography. Compulsive pornography use or addiction is unhealthy and results in the experience of negative emotions. Also, if you believe negative messages about pornography, you might experience negative emotions when you view pornography.

Pornography Use in the Early Years (0-16 Years)

Porn in Early Years

Ideally, only adults should view porn because they have a more discerning power to have a healthy relationship with pornography, but unfortunately, adolescents and children are exposed to porn with or without their consent via the internet and social media.

So, as expected, pornography use in the early years can have negative outcomes, including risky behaviors and skewed attitudes about sexuality. Some studies have found links between intentional porn use during childhood and delinquent behavior, increased substance abuse, and higher numbers of sexual partners during adolescence. 

It is important to note that it is normal for adolescents to experience sexual maturation, including increased physical changes, sex hormones, sexual fantasies, sexual curiosity, and experimentation with masturbation. So, it shouldn’t be odd for adolescents to want to view or listen to porn. They just need comprehensive sex education to understand how to have a healthy relationship with pornography.

What Makes One a Porn Addict?

Addiction relates to having an irresistible urge to use porn and not being able to say “no” to that urge. If porn keeps you from being productive, if it gets in the way of your daily responsibilities, or if you find yourself watching, listening to, or reading porn at times when you should be doing other things, you might be addicted to porn. If you’ve also tried to stop watching porn, but you find yourself watching it all the time, you might be addicted to porn. 

When to Seek Help 

If you have signs of addiction to porn or if your relationship with porn is causing issues for you or your relationship, you may need to seek professional help. You can talk to me, a sex coach, HERE. Send me an email at amishikah@gmail.com for a free 15-minute sex coaching session, or click the live chat button (the red and white circle on the bottom of your screen) to send me a message.

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CERTIFIED SEX COACH

Ami Shikah is a Certified Sex Coach, clinical sexologist, and radio personality with an Advanced Postgraduate Diploma in Global Sexual and Reproductive Health Management. She loves anything and everything sex as long as it is consensual, pleasurable and free of any form of discrimination, harm or violence. On this blog, her aim is to promote sexual literacy, provide a source of arousal, and promote sexual wellness. If you need to talk to a sex professional about your sexual concerns or issues, she is the one to talk to. She can help you solve your sexual problems. She will help you have the most amazing sexual experiences and live the sex life of your dreams. Sex is a basic need and a natural part of who we are as human beings. Exercise your right to sexual pleasure today! Email her at amishikah@gmail.com for a complimentary sex coaching session.

One Comment

  1. Wow.. this is what I've always wanted to read about and finally it's out.. This article is very educative.

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