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KNIFE PLAY FOR PLEASURE (IN SEX AND BDSM)

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I don’t know about you, but I find knife play incredibly erotic and wild. I posted a screenshot from Reddit that mentioned knifeplay on Twitter (@amisdiaries) yesterday and the responses I got suggested that so many people do not know what exactly knife play entails. It’s what informed my decision to write this article to educate and tell y’all the basic things you need to know about the act.

Keep Reading!

WHAT EXACTLY IS KNIFE PLAY

Knife play is a form of fear play and edge play (a BDSM act that is dangerous, inadvisable and can easily cause harm). It involves the use of blades/knives/sharp objects to invoke fear and excitement for pleasure.

It’s also a form of power-play because the partner who holds the knife dominates or controls the scene and the other submits by staying still, getting blindfolded, taking instructions, getting teased and feeling the edge of the blade on their skin.  

Knife play can be anyone’s kink or fetish. If you always require it to get pleasure from sex, it is your fetish, and if it’s just something you enjoy/find pleasurable, and can still have satisfying sex without it, it is your kink. 

WHAT CAN BE USED FOR KNIFE PLAY?
  1. Blades
  2. Knives (extra sharp or very dull)
  3. Daggers
  4. Swords
  5. Letter opener
  6. Banjo pick
  7. Scalpels
  8. Lancets
  9. Combs
  10. Surgical instruments
HOW IS IT DONE? 
  1. Running the blunt edge of the knife on a partner’s skin
  2. Temperature play – either heating the knife or cooling it before running it on the skin
  3. Showing the sharpest knife to partner to evoke fear
  4. Cutting away clothing with a sharp knife
  5. Scratching of the skin
  6. Removing wax after wax play
  7. Teasing a partner by inserting in an open mouth but not cutting or touching any part of the mouth.

WHAT MAKES KNIFE PLAY EROTIC?

  • Arousal From Fear 

Think about how terrifying knife play can be! Knowing so well that the sharp knife can easily cut you/break your skin can be both scary and exciting for some people. AND IT TURNS THEM ON!

Here’s why: For such people, fear comes along with the release of dopamine (the feel-good/pleasure hormone) that makes them enjoy being in terrifying situations. Hence, the more scared they are, the more pleasure they get and the easier it is for them to get an orgasm during knife play. 

  • Power-Play (Submission and Domination)

During knife play, a submissive gets so much excitement/ecstasy from being left at their partner’s mercy because the sharp knife can easily break the skin and leave them scarred. Your eyes are shut with blindfolds, you can’t see a thing, your senses are heightened, you are naked, and all you feel is the tip of the sharp blade on your skin. Imagine how fun that will be if you are a submissive. It can be so intense! It makes you hypersensitive and the sensation you feel when the knife touches any part of your skin can make you intensely aroused.

  • How About The Person Holding The Knife/Sharp Object?

Dominants love to take control because it turns them on and knife play gives them precisely that. They are free to provide instructions and watch their partner do as they say because they don’t want to be hurt.

Another thing is the reactions they get. The fear, excitement, and pleasure felt by the partner receiving the stimulation results in physical reactions like gasps, their eyes widening (if there are no blindfolds), pupils dilating, twitches, and moans. It can be so arousing, knowing that they are giving their partner that much pleasure. Every reaction/sound they hear goes straight to their genitals.

  • Sadism & Masochism

Some kinksters prefer knife play resulting in pain and shallow cuts because they love enduring pain (masochists) or instilling pain on their partner(sadists). In such cases, the pain they get is translated into pleasure, making them enjoy the act.

It’s imperative to know your partner well enough and discuss boundaries before engaging in any kink to know how far you can go and what to avoid.

KNIFE PLAY SHOULDN’T CAUSE INJURIES

Generally, knife play isn’t supposed to cause injuries even though it happens in some situations because of sharp instruments, accidents, sadism and masochism. It also requires a level of trust, primarily because of how dangerous it can be. I mean, how do you put yourself in such a vulnerable situation with a partner you don’t know well enough or a partner you don’t trust? Isn’t that a recipe for something disastrous? 

They can quickly kill you if they want or cut you in your most fragile places and leave you with long-term health defects. I wouldn’t engage in knife play with a night-stand unless our conversation prior to us getting naked gave me the impression that they are worthy of being trusted enough (might never happen). Additionally, I wouldn’t engage in knife play if I’m not sure of my partner’s mental state. 

GIVING KNIFE PLAY A TRY

All forms of edge play require so much research, training and knowledge. Do not explore any unless you are well-equipped to make it as safe as possible. That aside, you need consent, and you need to have safewords before giving any kink a try.

  • Consent and Safewords

Your partner needs to know what exactly knife play entails, the risks involved and every other thing you have in mind before they can give consent. 

Secondly, you need a safeword. A safeword and a non-verbal safeword (sign to draw a partner’s attention) helps you ensure safety during any sexual activity. Once that word is said or you notice the sign, you stop whatever you are doing and talk about the way forward. It could be because you/your partner was uncomfortable, in pain or had a change in mind about exploring the kink.

The easiest safewords you can go for:

  1. Red: for when you need your partner to stop whatever they are doing
  2. Yellow: for when you need your partner to take it easy and not go farther
  3. Green: when you are okay and enjoying it.

Non-verbal safewords:

  1. Snapping of fingers
  2. Hitting a surface with your palm a number of times (it could be a wall, bed, their chest or scalp)

HOW TO GO ABOUT IT AS A BEGINNER

After finding out all you need to know about knife play and getting consent from your partner, I’d advise you to get an incredibly dull knife, a very sharp knife, sword/dagger and blindfolds.

Starting the scene:

  1. While they are naked, show your partner the sharp knife and let them know exactly what you can do with it during the act. Let them know how you will use it on their skin and instruct them to be still and do as you say if they don’t want to get hurt.
  2. Secondly, cover their eyes with the blindfolds while they lie down. You can use cuffs and bed restraints if you want.
  3. Now, put the sharp knife away and pick the incredibly dull knife. They should think that you are using the sharp knife to make it more intense.
  4. Run the edge of the knife lightly to create pleasure.
  5. You can talk to them in the process, scare them the more, or remain silent and let them fantasize on their own.
USING A SHARP KNIFE

The truth is, sharp knives are dangerous. You might end up cutting your partner without meaning to, and interestingly, it is what gives some people the thrill they seek from knife play. If you are going to use a sharp nice during knife play, take note of the image below:

  1. The parts of the body with purple circles are NO-GO ZONES. The knife shouldn’t go there because cuts in such areas can be fatal.
  2. Red zones –There are DANGER ZONES which can easily be cut with a sharp knife.
  3. Yellow zones – These require caution, so you will have to be very attentive and not apply any form of pressure to prevent cuts
  4. Green zones – Great for knife play. It’s hard to get accidental incisions in these areas.
HOW TO PREVENT CUTS AND INJURIES
  1. Use an incredibly dull or blunt knife (or a fake knife)
  2. Don’t apply pressure (if the blade is sharp)
  3. Don’t engage in knife play if you don’t have self-control
  4. Use the tip lightly to create sensations and don’t push deeper

KEY THINGS TO NOTE

  1. You need trust
  2. Understand the basics and the need to stay still. Avoid wriggling during knife play
  3. Set boundaries and discuss hard limits before the session – how far you are both willing to go – Deep and shallow cuts? Scars? 
  4. Don’t renegotiate during the scene. Overexcitement and shock can make people ask for more than they really want.
  5. Always sterilize (appropriately) the knife with alcohol before and after each scene
  6. Avoid blades with serrated edges
  7. Have a first-aid kit with bandages, cotton wool, alcohol wipes, gel, antibiotic cream, and steri-strips in the event of cuts and bleeding.
  8. Don’t do it when you are under the influence of drugs (alcohol/psychedelics)
  9. Don’t do it when ill, physically or mentally compromised (depressed, anxious, suicidal, etc.)
  10. Communicate! Regular check-ins are necessary
  11. Find out if they take medication/drug that makes it easy for them to bleed

WHAT IS NOT KNIFE PLAY?

Some people assume that because knife play relates to sex, it involves the insertion of sharp knives or objects in the vagina till it reaches the cervix to create cuts/lacerations in the cervical wall. There’s an assumption that the pain created is translated into pleasurable sensations that make women enjoy it.

Hello, that isn’t it. What I just described is basically stabbing someone in the vagina, and it shouldn’t be pleasurable in any way. She could die from that! Knife play isn’t intended to create injuries, and it doesn’t involve the insertion of knives in the vagina or anus. 

In cases where a woman enjoys or claims to enjoy this wrong form of knife play, it could be because of a neurological or psychological maladaptation which makes the brain transform pain signals into pleasure even when she’s at risk of dying. If you meet a woman who asks for it, ignore her. You don’t want to be charged with murder.

DEPRESSION, SELF-HARM AND KNIFE PLAY

Anyone who self-harms and uses a blade or sharp objects to cut their skin because they are depressed, mentally ill or suicidal might seek solace in knife play. Hence, it is important to know how mentally stable a partner is before engaging in an act like that. Additionally, If the person has a history of self-harm, knife play can be triggering, so don’t try it with them.

I know how you can’t be entirely sure of a partner’s mental state, but you need to know your partner well enough, else you might end up giving them the satisfaction they get from harming themselves. They can easily encourage you to keep going during the scene because they need the pain to distract them from their mental issues. Imagine how far a suicidal person can urge you to go because they are chasing death.

BLOODPLAY

Knife play and bloodplay are NOT THE SAME. Once again, knife play play in itself isn’t intended to cause injury or draw blood. It’s basically about pleasure and how it relates to fear and/or power-play. The focus is on the skin’s top layer, not deep enough to draw blood during the scene. People who are into bloodplay aroused by blood, so they cut deeper to draw blood. Some are masochists who need to feel pain to feel good. Such people will use knives and sharp objects to cut until there’s blood oozing out of your skin. It’s dangerous and extreme. Keep that in mind!

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

Do you want to give knife play a try? Let me know in the comments! Do you have a story to share about knife play? Type it in the comments. Do you have any questions? Go ahead and ask in the comments or send me a live chat (red and white circle on your screen) and I will reply in no time.

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STAY SAFE!

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MENTAL HEALTH ADVOCATE, WRITER, SEX AND RELATIONSHIP EXPERT

Ami Shikah is a sex educator and mental health advocate. She is passionate about sex education and is working towards making her website/blog a place where people come to for knowledge and information that will help them make healthy decisions about sex and sexuality. Mental health isn't treated with much importance in her part of the world (Ghana, Africa) and as someone who has had to deal with depression and suicidal thoughts, she hopes to share her experiences with the world and help other people like her. She has in-depth knowledge about sex, sexual health, sexuality, vaginal health, pregnancy and abortion and is working to share it all with the world. She has also made it possible for people to ask questions and get answers to them anytime.

3 Comments

  1. I don't think this is a good thing to do
    Coz it can end up in something else.
    Not advisable

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